Flash forward a couple of months and I’ve met three people offline. One ended up being a schizophrenic who I met once only because I thoroughly enjoyed his writing and his philosophical mindset. I just wanted a friendship from this stranger who was a character who stepped out of “A Beautiful Mind.” Another ended up being very dull. Being dull was dreadful but at least I can compensate. Not liking dogs or my Teddy is a deal-breaker.

There was one guy who I did like and we had gone had several dates. We weren’t much of anything still at that time and I was still just trying to get to know him. While my profile was still active, I had removed all pictures and profile content after we exchanged our first few messages over a month before. I also realized that while the idea of dating can be exciting and I did enjoy meeting new people, chronic dating is not for me. I enjoy meeting and talking to one person at a time in that context.

I didn’t want to be bothered by emails from Match anymore, so I signed on for the first time in a long time to cancel my account prematurely. I still had a month or so left but didn’t think I needed it. Out of curiosity, I checked to see who had viewed my profile. To my surprise, I saw your name.

I felt a little excited and flustered to see you were back. You hadn’t messaged me, so I did not want to be the one to make connect. But then again, I had clearly given the message on Match that I wasn’t participating anymore with the removal of all my content. So, why would you message me then? I’m definitely not one to initiate, but once again, I found myself messaging you.

I was happy to get your response and that you remembered me. We ended up setting a date for our first date and the rest was history.

RE: Hey

My favorite Vietnamese hands down is Pho Grand (however I’ve never tried Kim Ngan :). The only thing that I’ve made that’s related to Vietnamese food is spring rolls and they came out really well.

Send me a message when you get back and we’ll get something good to eat.

Nick

You knew about Vietnamese food! Although wasn’t confident in your choice of Vietnamese restaurants, but I knew that I’d be able to help you discover the best in Vietnamese in St. Louis. I was really looking forward to continuing our conversation and meeting you when I came back from Paris. I believe I ended leaving a couple days after this message from you.

While I was in Paris, I kept my profile active but removed my pictures to discourage people from messaging me. I figured that if someone sent me a message based on just my descriptions alone then they were more worth my time. When I would see messages from Match in my inbox, I thought about you and wondered if you would be dating someone by the time I got back.

When I came two weeks later, your profile was deactivated. I found myself surprised by how disappointed I was about this. I hadn’t had much interaction with you, but there was something old and charming about you that I really liked. I ended up messaging you anyway, hoping that I’d hear back from you. I didn’t get a response, so I moved on…

We exchange a few more messages before I headed off to Paris. I thought it was very sexy that you loved to cook and seemed to know a lot about it.

RE: Hey

Cuc

I’m so jealous…Paris (I’ve never been can I come along 😉

RE: Hey

I am adding to my last message… I hit “send” by mistake. I like to cook all sorts of cuisines. My main cookbooks that I dig for recipes out of are the New York Times heritage cookbook, Joy of Cooking, and an old family cookbook that includes a lot of southern style dishes. I really like traditional French, Indian, Persian, and Vietnamese food when eating out.

If you’d like to grab a bit to eat when you come back from Paris send me a message.

I hope you have a great trip!

Nick

There’s a lot of horror stories about online dating and also a lot of stories that made me wonder if it could possibly work for me. I loved the idea of being able to pick and choose who I wanted based on my defined parameters, but the loss of the organic feeling of bumping into someone special in real life always bothered me about it. I guess sometimes I can be a romantic. On top of that, I’ve never been good at dating. I always say, I’m a serial monogamous…

I had given Harmony a try for a week or so at the beginning of the year and found it incredibly boring and very few matches to even consider. Half a year later, I found myself curious about Match. I figured, why shouldn’t I learn to date a little and have some fun? Having just purchased my airline tickets to Paris for the following week, I created an account with the alias that best described me in the moment: ILUV2TRAVELDOU.

gateway2thebest

The one good (and bad) thing about Match is that there is an over abundant number of matches. There’s very little substance in even the candidates that matched 90% or higher. After perusing through the pictures of many douchey or creepy looking guys, your picture caught my eye.

I thought you were cute with a kind face, and looked slightly European. Your nickname seemed a little too confident, but who I am to judge when my own was pretentious? I wish I could remember exactly how your profile read… it was witty, funny, and just flirty enough. The way you wrote suggested that you were a good communicator and I admire that characteristic. Also, the fact that you joked about jet-setting off to Paris for a date, Hemingway, and Van Gogh made me “favorite” you (my only favorite during my short stay on Match, by the way). I was taken back by your “divorced” status though, so I left it as that. There was some potential in Match, so I decided to do the two week trial.

I didn’t get around to messaging you because I wasn’t sure that I wanted to initiate any conversations with anyone. Then, I noticed that you had viewed my profile and liked one of my pictures. I appreciated the fact that the photo you liked was the one of me with a dog at the shelter. I knew that you had a couple of weiner dogs based on your profile but this reminded me that you were an animal person and this was important to me. Still, I hesitated due to the fact that you were divorced.

I eventually came to the realization that I’m not that young anymore and it’s not going to be easy to meet decent guys who haven’t had a serious history. Let’s face the facts, people tend to meet their first spouse when they are younger and then end up marrying in their twenties. I’m way past this stage and if anything, maybe I’m the one who might appear to have a problem since I’m not part of that statistic. People get married often when they haven’t quite found themselves and when they change, so does their marriage and bond. Maybe you had a story. I thought, the hell with it and message you.

Your first message to me…

RE: Hey

Hehe thanks, the dogs won’t hold still for selfie I tried but eventually gave up. Weiner dogs are very stubborn and are hard to photograph unless aged Vermont chedder cheese is involved.

I also love traveling and road trips (have you driven the pacific coast highway, it’s break taking).

I chuckled at the part of the Vermont [cheddar] cheese. It was different and I told my girlfriend about it. We liked to create nicknames for the people who I interacted with on Match and you became “Vermont Cheese.”

Your love for parentheses came through in your second message that evening. It was cute. This is truly your style even now. I love this small detail about you.

RE: Hey

I was in Montreal about a month ago for work and loved the old town (it looks like a quaint little European village). The food is amazing (seasoned with a lot of fresh herbs and not too salty).

You went to Cincinnati for just Chilli dogs? Wow that’s must have been a strong craving. I am big foodie myself and love to cook.

Have you ever driven along the river road near Alton IL in the fall (the color in the trees are spectacular)?

Nick